The pros and cons of always saying YES to your children

As parents, we are conditioned to say no when we feel that it is needed to discipline our kids. When they want to stay up till late to watch television or want to miss school at times. But this also makes us think often that we are being too harsh on them or being too authoritative? As per some psychologists, using the term no for your kid’s demand can restrict their growth and make them doubt their decision as grown-ups. This concept has given rise to a new style of parenting where parents try to limit the word NO and agree to most of the demands made by their kids unless there is a really good reason not to. It is called “Yes Parenting.”

What is YES parenting?

Yes, parenting allows kids to do whatever they want to, be it painting walls with crayons or having chocolates for breakfast. Following this parenting style does not mean that you have to be a doormat and let your kids walk all over you. It is more about restricting yourself from saying no when it is not needed and setting up healthy boundaries.

The concept of yes parenting has emerged from the idea that parents say no too often to their kids, even when it is not required. Studies suggest that a one-year-old kid hears no about 400 times a day, which is way too much. This quashes the opportunity for them to explore the world around them and test their limits.

Yes, parenting encourages parents to say more yes and let their kids explore the world. If they make any demand which is not acceptable then rephrase the sentence in a way that they do not have to use the word no. But just like any other style of parents, this style of parenting also has some pros and cons.

Pros of yes parenting

Experts believe that turning to yes parenting has many benefits. It might help kids to become more successful in the future and also improve the relationship between kids and their parents. This allows kids to live their lives to the fullest without the fear of falling. Here are some pros of following this style of parenting.

Strengthens the bond between parent-child: When you agree to your kid’s demand, the possibility of kids hiding something from your decreases. You will not have to spy on them to know what they are up to.

Builds confidence in the child: Allowing your kids to do what they want, even when you know that they might fail in it helps to build their confidence.

Makes them more creative: Yes parenting makes kids more creative, understand the world in a better way and try out new things as they know that their parents would always agree to it.

Helps the child accept no easier: When the demand of kids is always met they become more acceptable to no for an answer.

Tantrums and fits are fewer: Kids are most likely to throw fewer tantrums.

Cons of yes parenting

Yes, parenting is about building healthy boundaries and disciplining kids in a positive way. It is about your kids to chase his/her dreams without causing harm to others. It is crucial for parents to know when to draw the line and knowing at what point yes parents need to say no to their child’s demand.

Fails to establish boundaries: When parents do not restrict kids from doing things that are not acceptable, kids fail to recognize the boundaries set by others.

Makes kids self-centered: They make everything about themselves and start believing that the world revolves around them. There are chances they may undervalue other’s feelings and needs.

Exhausts parents: Meeting the unusual demand of the kids may also be taxing and emotionally exhausting for the parents.

The bottom line

When it comes to parents no one style of parenting is applicable for all kids. Every kid is different and they need to be raised differently. You need to try and see what works in the case of your kid and what doesn’t.

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